Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I was installing TVs in a hospital. When I knocked on a door, a female voice asked me to come in. I opened the door to see an 80 year old woman standing in front of me, naked. She then complained when I hesitated to help her to put some clothes on. FML

#12483981
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28682) - you deserved it (2621)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:21pm - misc - by Olorin (man) - Germany (Nordrhein-Westfalen)

Today, I thought it would be funny to moon people out of my friend's car window. I rolled down the window and mooned a random couple. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I had to get out of the car and pick up my phone and wallet, which were in my back pocket. FML

#12483686
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5721) - you deserved it (54934)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:05pm - misc - by fullmoonfml (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I spent forty minutes trying to break into my own house after being locked out. After finally getting in through a small unlocked window, I discovered my keys in my pants pocket. FML

#12481000
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9135) - you deserved it (42661)

On 08/12/2010 at 4:33pm - misc - by Jason (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend's mom and dad walked in on us while we were playing naked twister. FML

#12476862
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21199) - you deserved it (34758)

On 08/12/2010 at 12:19pm - intimacy - by FML (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I got back from a 3 and a half week trip to South Africa to do volunteer work with children in townships. My parents forgot to pick me up, and I had to sit there by myself and wait for them, while 80 people of the same organization got loving hugs from their proud parents. FML

#12475653
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39759) - you deserved it (3602)

On 08/12/2010 at 10:50am - work - by leonieNL (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I heard my parents having sex. It wouldn't have been so bad if we weren't in the same hotel room. They thought I was asleep. FML

#12474079
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47382) - you deserved it (3632)

On 08/12/2010 at 8:02am - intimacy - by ScarredEars - United States

Today, while at my friend's house, I noticed her brother had a bit of an accent. I laughingly said "Is it me or does your little brother have an accent?" She stared and replied with "No, he has autism." FML

#12473698
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15755) - you deserved it (45751)

On 08/12/2010 at 7:00am - misc - by kggggg - United States (Nevada)

Today, I went on a trip with some people from work to watch a baseball game. Halfway through the game, one of my managers shook my hand and said "Nice to Meet You." I've been working there for 3 months. FML

#12472687
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27527) - you deserved it (4355)

On 08/12/2010 at 5:03am - work - by skyphoenix (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I told my parents that I wasn't feeling very social and up for company. How do they try to make me feel better? By inviting a whole bunch of people I don't know to a pool party at my house. They said I should face my fears. I'm now in my room, hiding. FML

#12472098
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30187) - you deserved it (8914)

On 08/12/2010 at 4:07am - misc - by antisocial (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my band got booed off stage. FML

#12470997
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24127) - you deserved it (46180)

On 08/12/2010 at 2:53am - work - by malos - United States

Today, the girl who tormented my life for nine years was hired at my part-time job. We're assigned to work together on a three-month-long project which will involve tons of communication. FML

#12467820
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34926) - you deserved it (3004)

On 08/12/2010 at 12:31am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my mother why she had me in the first place, as we never get along. She replied because my father wanted me. So, I called my father to ask him the same question, he said he only wanted to have me to keep my mother around, and that didn't work, so I was a waste. FML

#12467106
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45281) - you deserved it (4340)

On 08/12/2010 at 12:00am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was watching TV when a Toy Story 3 commercial came on. My Mom said, "Oh, I remember when I took you to see Toy Story. Now Andy's all grown up and so are you. The only difference is Andy is going to college and you're not." FML

#12463713
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18966) - you deserved it (44574)

On 08/11/2010 at 9:55pm - misc - by Chris (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



FML's blog

  • Eni's illustrated FML
  • Greetings worshipers of lines and colours! This week, with the help of a talented young illustrator we’re checking kids out. No, not like that. Damn, that sounded bad. We’re taking a different look a…

Friday 12 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: