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Today, to be nice, I baked cookies for my step-mom as a birthday present. I burnt my hand while putting them in the oven, but I'd hoped it would be worth it. When she got home, I gave one for her to try. She took a bite, spit it out, and threw it on the floor, asking if it was a joke or if I was really trying to poison her. FML

#12538079
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31518) - you deserved it (3453)

On 08/15/2010 at 12:05pm - health - by shinee - Singapore

Today, I witnessed a series of nude old people cycling in the city. I was eating. FML

#12536404
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37222) - you deserved it (5172)

On 08/15/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by anonymous - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I found out that my overprotective parents hired a private investigator a month ago, who since then has been watching my perfectly normal boyfriend, in case he "tries to rape or kill" me. We're both 25 years old. FML

#12536265
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41357) - you deserved it (2770)

On 08/15/2010 at 8:52am - love - by wtf - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my sister got caught cheating on her boyfriend. She was cheating on him with my boyfriend. FML

#12535853
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49771) - you deserved it (3680)

On 08/15/2010 at 7:39am - intimacy - by bbbblt - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my Platoon Sergeant caught me unshaved, so now I have to write a 1000 word essay on "The importance of shaving." FML

#12535348
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17529) - you deserved it (38871)

On 08/15/2010 at 5:47am - work - by jacko (man) - Reserved

Today, I put on makeup for a picture. My Facebook profile picture. That's how much of a life I actually have. FML

#12534816
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13834) - you deserved it (32261)

On 08/15/2010 at 4:42am - misc - by Lifeless (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I haven't had any real sleep in 4 days because I am an insomniac. My father is also an insomniac but he takes Ambien to get his rest. Me? I'm stuck staring at the ceiling for hours because he won't let me take any kind of medication, because he doesn't want me "getting addicted." FML

#12533834
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32797) - you deserved it (3482)

On 08/15/2010 at 3:23am - health - by sleeplessinID (woman) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my mom called me to the laundry room after she saw a dead animal in there. I took a look and agreed we should call animal control. After ten minutes of freaking out, they finally arrived to confirm that the dead animal was the hood to my winter jacket. FML

#12531799
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8604) - you deserved it (40323)

On 08/15/2010 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home. As a volunteer, I'm not supposed to accept any money or gifts from any of the residents. However, one elderly woman kept insisting I take her gold watch. After politely refusing for the fifth time, she decided to chuck it at my face. FML

#12530791
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33525) - you deserved it (3904)

On 08/15/2010 at 12:39am - work - by ouch (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out I won't be able to go to college. Why? My sister's horse needs surgery. FML

#12530276
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49352) - you deserved it (5068)

On 08/15/2010 at 12:12am - animals - by goodbye-college (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car was stolen. From my driveway. By the guy who sold it to me. FML

#12528127
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39005) - you deserved it (4075)

On 08/14/2010 at 10:25pm - misc - by carless (woman) - United States (California)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41163) - you deserved it (2897)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I picked up a penny off the street for good luck on my job interview. A few seconds later, a hobo beat me up, took my wallet, and ran off. The whole ordeal made me late for the interview. So much for good luck. FML

#12524793
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29479) - you deserved it (3622)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:10pm - work - by hobosarea-holes (man) - United States (New York)



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