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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was taking a shower for the first time in my new apartment. The shower head broke off the wall and slammed onto my head while spraying water everywhere. I tried to stop the water but only stopped the cold and got burnt by the hot. FML

#12638821
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31002) - you deserved it (3202)

On 08/20/2010 at 2:14am - misc - by home owner - United States (New York)

Today, after twisting my knee playing soccer with my friends, I had to take myself to the hospital. Apparently finishing the game was more important to them. FML

#12638135
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28236) - you deserved it (4467)

On 08/20/2010 at 1:34am - health - by Sam - United States

Today, I got woken up by Hallelujah blasting outside my apartment windows for 30 minutes straight. FML

#12636140
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24871) - you deserved it (3696)

On 08/20/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by notyoueallie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that my boyfriend has been cheating on me. When I confronted him about it, he asked which girl I'd found out about. FML

#12630401
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40647) - you deserved it (3484)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:11pm - love - by Sara246 (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML

#12626936
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10924) - you deserved it (82381)

On 08/19/2010 at 3:16pm - intimacy - by captainocd - United States (Texas)

kbaker90's comment : Two things: 1. Poor girl. No wonder she's self-conscious. 2. OP, your man card, please. *holds out hand*

See all the comments →

Today, seconds after my mom put my yorkie onto my bed, he threw up. His head was not fully over the bed itself, so the wet chunks fell straight into my backpack onto my new school books. FML

#12625429
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28704) - you deserved it (3445)

On 08/19/2010 at 1:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, all the while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

#12624086
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41095) - you deserved it (3494)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:48am - misc - by feartheend511 - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend admitted that he finds his car more attractive than me. FML

#12623865
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33207) - you deserved it (6689)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:28am - love - by yup okay (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got wii fit, wii Mario kart and wii Mario galaxy for my birthday, I don't have a wii. FML

#12622132
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37412) - you deserved it (4713)

On 08/19/2010 at 8:02am - misc - by ktin - Australia (Victoria)

Today, mine and my boyfriend's concerns that we are too loud in bed were definitely confirmed when his entire family stopped the movie they were watching and vacated the cinema room located directly below us. They returned and resumed a while after we were finished. FML

#12622107
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8314) - you deserved it (34889)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally found my cellphone when I heard WHACKWHACKWHACK inside the washing machine. FML

#12621906
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16036) - you deserved it (27886)

On 08/19/2010 at 7:25am - misc - by FreeToFly3733 - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my wife put divorce papers in my birthday card. FML

#12621372
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61721) - you deserved it (4415)

On 08/19/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by divorced - United States (Tennessee)

 Today, I came home from a long day at work, and heard voices coming from my living room. I thought my house was being robbed so I called 911. Turns out I left the T.V. on. FML

#12620579
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8380) - you deserved it (37454)

On 08/19/2010 at 4:22am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)



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