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Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML

#5443541
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37702) - you deserved it (2478)

On 09/24/2009 at 4:05am - love - by Sir Smokalot - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took the family to the Rainforest Café. There was no parking and I detest paying $12 for valet parking. I parked at Wal-Greens across the street in the only spot without a "patrons only, violators will be towed" sign. It was covered by the tree branches. It cost me $225 for the cab and fine. FML

#5442113
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9242) - you deserved it (38582)

On 09/24/2009 at 1:24am - money - by fme (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was walking my dogs. I had a doggy bag, and was holding it closed, then breathing in it, so it would blow up. My dogs 'went', so I picked it up and kept walking. As I was heading home, I absent-mindedly started blowing into the bag again. Everything ended up in my mouth and on my face. FML

#5441991
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10471) - you deserved it (74080)

On 09/24/2009 at 1:17am - animals - by doggybag (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was planning on breaking up with my girlfriend of five years in two days time. She just mailed me a care package that said, "I'd die without you." FML

#5441571
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35961) - you deserved it (12304)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:52am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I moved in with an older gentleman renting out a room. Tonight, he had a domestic dispute with his girlfriend who threw a lawn chair at my car. FML

#5441179
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30553) - you deserved it (1938)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:34am - misc - by Davios (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I surprised my girlfriend with U2 tickets. Still no action. FML

#5441103
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12202) - you deserved it (27452)

On 09/24/2009 at 12:30am - intimacy - by loveless (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my navy boyfriend, who's stationed in Italy, calls me to say he is in San Francisco and is coming to see me. After scrambling to get ready, he calls me back to say he doesn't recognize the train station. After searching on Google Maps, it becomes clear he's drunk at Oktoberfest. In Germany. FML

#5438718
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38877) - you deserved it (2756)

On 09/23/2009 at 10:47pm - love - by Spatch (woman) - United States (California)

Today, an injured guest stopped at the front desk of the hotel and raved about my kindness and 'commitment to customer service'. He told my boss about how I'd gone to the ice machine and personally delivered a bag of ice for his injured knee. Guess who got written up for leaving the front desk? FML

Today, I had to hand write a 10 page essay for one of my classes. When I turned it in I got an automatic zero. It was written in blue. Not black. FML

#5436194
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42516) - you deserved it (11192)

On 09/23/2009 at 9:18pm - misc - by stupid (woman) - United States

Today, I got it on for the first time with a guy I've been dating. He had to turn the TV up loud so that his mom couldn't hear anything. I'm 20 years old and I lost my virginity with Disney Channel blaring in the background. FML

#5434150
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12461) - you deserved it (19028)

On 09/23/2009 at 8:08pm - intimacy - by seriouslystupid (woman) - United States

Today, my dad threw up on my dress. My wedding dress. While he was walking me down the aisle. FML

#5431365
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60008) - you deserved it (3027)

On 09/23/2009 at 5:38pm - misc - by poorgirl (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I bought a fish bowl and a fish for $15. I brought him home and sat him on my desk. Everything was going well until the shelf gave out and his bowl slid off of the shelf... onto my $2,000 computer. The computer is fried and is not covered by the insurance, the fish is fine. FML

#5430924
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32076) - you deserved it (9743)

On 09/23/2009 at 4:48pm - misc - by Bubba (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found a video camera behind a plant in my bedroom. My husband uses it to video tape himself having sex, with another woman. FML

#5429475
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33956) - you deserved it (2130)

On 09/23/2009 at 3:32pm - intimacy - by ugh (woman) - United States (Ohio)



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