Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML

#7925125
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32835) - you deserved it (3228)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:27am - animals - by btg - United States (California)

Today, during a basketball game, I fell into metal chairs which then decided to fold in, causing me to fall to the floor in a very dramatic and painful fall. When I stood up, so did everyone else and they were all clapping, including the other team. FML

#7925072
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20032) - you deserved it (2978)

On 02/06/2010 at 1:25am - health - by aurorason - Sent from mobile version

Today, my soon-to-be mother-in-law walked in on me masturbating, in my own house. FML

#7923613
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19286) - you deserved it (5278)

On 02/06/2010 at 12:31am - intimacy - by Isabell (woman) - Australia

Today, right before a huge snowstorm hit our area, I broke up with my girlfriend. In her fury, she decided to grab my car keys and roll down all four windows in my car. I now have 2 feet of half melted snow in my backseat. FML

#7923030
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (11042)

On 02/06/2010 at 12:12am - love - by snowman (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend of six months dumped me over the phone. I'm in the military and recently had to move away to another fort. We'd agreed that we would try to make long distance work. I'd even offered to buy a plane ticket to come see her each weekend. I've been gone less than two weeks. FML

#7922927
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26308) - you deserved it (2431)

On 02/06/2010 at 12:09am - love - by Crud (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I realized that the only food I have is four months' worth of nutrisystem food from when my parents went on the nutrisystem diet. I am not able to secure a job and buy my own food, so I have two choices: die of starvation or die of nasty nutrisystem food. FML

#7918887
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19492) - you deserved it (8059)

On 02/05/2010 at 10:19pm - health - by Henry (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked past a group of men at the mall and one of them mooed at me. FML

#7916627
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30182) - you deserved it (6530)

On 02/05/2010 at 9:18pm - misc - by LynnJ (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was in my drama class and I was standing behind the curtains. My friend accidentally bumped me into the bin that was hidden behind the curtain. Everyone heard me fall and they opened the curtains. My butt was stuck in it and my knees were in front of my face. No one helped. FML

#7914611
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21044) - you deserved it (2614)

On 02/05/2010 at 8:20pm - misc - by JD (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dog accidentally crapped on her leash. When I flicked the leash to get the poo off, it went flying. Have you ever had warm poo hit you in the face on a cold day when there's 6 inches of snow on the ground? I have. FML

#7913686
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23566) - you deserved it (8796)

On 02/05/2010 at 7:50pm - animals - by doggie_doo_face (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, there was this girl in heels running in front of me at school, and she slipped on ice. Trying to be a hero, I dropped my backpack and ran up to help her, but ended up slipping and landing on her leg. As I walked back to my backpack, I found out I dropped my laptop and broke it. FML

#7908847
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30298) - you deserved it (13199)

On 02/05/2010 at 4:27pm - misc - by POP101 (man) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I decided to change my boyfriend's background on his phone. As I was in the process of changing it, I noticed his most recent picture is of a naked girl. The naked girl happens to be my 18 year old sister. FML

#7908688
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46530) - you deserved it (4689)

On 02/05/2010 at 4:18pm - love - by whoknows?! - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was anxiously waiting for the guy I had a crush on to pick me up for our first date. He shows up with his son, whom I never knew about, and takes us to Chuck E. Cheese. FML

#7908561
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25485) - you deserved it (4759)

On 02/05/2010 at 4:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have fun at school. So, we went into the locker room. We were making out for a couple minutes when the door opened. It was the principal, who also happens to be her dad. FML

#7907702
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12165) - you deserved it (36352)

On 02/05/2010 at 3:17pm - love - by topfisherman (man) - United States (Ohio)



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