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today it's the first evening that mah husband and I will have without the kids in 8 months. We had been looking forward to it for ages, and mah husband had even bought me some lovely new lingerie for the occasion. Guesshat? I just got diarrhea. FML

#6776898
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37447) - you deserved it (3461)

On 12/16/2009 at 10:43am - love - by eww657 (woman) - United Kingdom (Bracknell Forest)

Today, I worked for three hours writing very neat notes with one of those pens that erase. I felt very accomplished, so decided to share it on Facebook. I brought my computer over to my lap on top of my notes. Turns out heat from laptops smudges ink from eraseable pens. I can't read my notes. big fat FML

#6775811
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9861) - you deserved it (27068)

On 12/16/2009 at 7:33am - misc - by ohhi_itsme123 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of 3 yeres confessd that he was sleeping with me and 5 other grls while we frst startd dating. He told me he numberd us and rolld a die to see which one he would date. I guess I won. FML

#6775724
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34282) - you deserved it (3420)

On 12/16/2009 at 7:09am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, Since I Had No Lesson Until 1pm, I Decidd To Head Out To The Store To Run Errands . Our School Has A Strict Policy Against Leaving The Campu During School Hours . I Returnd To A Fre Drill Taking Place . The Fre Assembly Point? The Student Parking Lot . All 900 Student Watchd Me Drive In . Mega FML

#6775023
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8937) - you deserved it (31184)

On 12/16/2009 at 4:37am - misc - by watchmaker (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I handed my resume in to a cafe that was hring. I returned home and noticed a voicemail, it was one from the boss 4 a trial. I eagerly returned the call, showing my enthusiasm. Without thinking, I ended with "ok love you. *GASP* ah, BYE" and quickly hung up. FML

#6774546
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9864) - you deserved it (23300)

On 12/16/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by babyfatt - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, both of my grandparent died in a car accident. My Mom an Dad thought it would looool make me feel better to know they were not my real grandparents, because I'm adopted. FML

#6774079
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57477) - you deserved it (2476)

On 12/16/2009 at 2:28am - misc - by barri (man) - Costa Rica (San Jose)

Today, I found the only man who hates sex . He's mah boyfriend . mega FML

#6773256
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24156) - you deserved it (3850)

On 12/16/2009 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Unsatisfied (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

my ex-boyfriend,ho I have been trying to get back together with, textd me. He askd me how life was going, he then askd me if I had the nakd picture of him savd on mah phone. I askd himhy. He replid that he wantd to send it to his crush. FML

#6773242
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27308) - you deserved it (4220)

On 12/16/2009 at 1:15am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend askd looool me y I have ( crotch acne ) . When I attemptd to explain that I have razor bumps from shaving, he got mad and said I was lying and insecure about my obvious facial and bodily acne problem . big fat FML

#6772428
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29765) - you deserved it (2970)

On 12/16/2009 at 12:15am - health - by RazorBumps (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was talking to mah parents, when all of a sudden mah dad starts freaking out an asking mah mom how I got this really bad allergy on mah face. My mom just laughd, an then I had to explain to him that it was just mah acne. The worst part is, he was dead serious the whole time. FML

#6770677
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23278) - you deserved it (2093)

On 12/15/2009 at 10:34pm - misc - by allergyface (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

today I was watching the show "Sixteen and Pregnant". I started bawlinghen the girl's dirtbag boyfriend proposed to her with a $20 ring he bought from Walmart because I was so lonely and was jealous of her "romantic relationship". mega FML

#6770582
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25164) - you deserved it (11101)

On 12/15/2009 at 10:30pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my mom revealed to me thathen I was in Preschool, I used to get caught in the bathroom with little boyshile I was feeling their "no no" area . I was giving hand jobs to boys before I could read . FML

#6768891
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28956) - you deserved it (7021)

On 12/15/2009 at 9:20pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

jcrook's comment : You were probably only doing it because you knew it was a taboo. It's kind of sad that a pre-school child would already have that impression. I literally blame society.

See all the comments →

Today, we had company over, an after dinner, I saw a package of gumballs sitting on the table. Figuring mah brother had brought them, I took one an bit it. I got a bunch of weird looks. Turns out wasn't a gumball - it was a mini paintball. FML

#6768008
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7850) - you deserved it (25448)

On 12/15/2009 at 8:39pm - misc - by BlueMouth (woman) - United States (New York)



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