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Today, I received a bouquet of flowers. I thought they might be from my crush, so I excitedly opened the card. It was from my druggie ex-boyfriend, who apparently can't move on with his life even after three years. The contents of the card? "Baby, I got you like a habit, and I can't give you up". FML

#8250207
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23495) - you deserved it (3275)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:52pm - love - by RosesAreRed (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML

#8248979
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23700) - you deserved it (6051)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by freakingow (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went to the store to buy a new lego set, only to find there weren't any left in stock. I started crying before I could make it out of the store. Oh, and I'm eighteen. FML

#8248390
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9482) - you deserved it (41824)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:43pm - misc - by Tibblesthepengwin (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I received a notice that my boyfriend had given me a rose via Happy Aquarium on Facebook. It came with a date cancellation so that he and his friends could play BioShock. FML

#8246413
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21551) - you deserved it (4247)

On 02/14/2010 at 11:32am - love - by Fv-day (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to have Valentine's Day sex. He then remembered it was unlimited pancakes at IHOP. FML

#8246402
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20220) - you deserved it (3427)

On 02/14/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by DallasGal (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend and I broke up. The reason? She slept with four men while I was two weeks away visiting my brother. She told me it was because she missed me so much. FML

#8243991
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25042) - you deserved it (2135)

On 02/14/2010 at 10:19am - intimacy - by CheatedOn (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, I realized that the "pimples" on my back weren't pimples at all. Because I was unable to see how bad they were for the last week, I never caught on to the fact the they were, in fact, ticks. FML

#8242645
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34407) - you deserved it (6026)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, after 22 years of perfect skin, I woke up with a bunch of angry zits on my nose. I used a clay face mask that was supposed to dry them out. Instead, they were bigger and green. Today is Valentine's day, I finally have a guy to go out with, and my nose looks like it's rotting off. FML

#8242504
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28078) - you deserved it (4853)

On 02/14/2010 at 9:14am - love - by zitgirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I received my first Valentine's day present ever: a dead mouse from my cat. FML

#8241571
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22365) - you deserved it (3388)

On 02/14/2010 at 8:24am - animals - by lex31 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was really depressed. I listed the top 50 reasons why I love her. Her response was "thanks for that but seriously, this video on youtube is hilarious." I couldn't cheer her up but apparently a 10 second video of a dog running in circles can. FML

#8238401
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28878) - you deserved it (3387)

On 02/14/2010 at 3:48am - love - by Samson (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to rub Tabasco sauce on my household toilet paper. FML

#8238239
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27456) - you deserved it (4295)

On 02/14/2010 at 3:42am - love - by dzisfml - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my dad decides to tell me he's taking the whole family to disney world, even my step-brother's girlfriend. But not me, because he can't "afford" it. FML

#8232410
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40300) - you deserved it (2213)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:49am - kids - by disneyworld (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while working security at the mall, someone shat his pants. The shit dripped all over the floor and escalator. I was the one who had to stand near the poop so no one stepped in it. FML

#8230374
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23535) - you deserved it (2193)

On 02/14/2010 at 12:07am - work - by mallcop - United States (Massachusetts)



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