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Man or woman?

Today, I saw a man on the bus with the strangest band shirt I have ever seen. I could not help but stare at it and try and figure what the band was, until he turned to me and said "why not take a picture asshole?" then got off the bus. As he walked away I saw that he was missing an arm. FML

#8737803
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26522) - you deserved it (5730)

On 03/01/2010 at 12:23am - misc - by theholt (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML

#8737489
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27322) - you deserved it (6851)

On 03/01/2010 at 12:13am - intimacy - by oboy - United States

Today, I was wearing my favorite silk sweater, one I actually paid full price for. I sat down in my desk chair to work, and when I tried to get up I felt a strange pull. A corner of my sweater is still stuck in the screw at the back of the chair, the rest is in the trash. FML

#8736997
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20805) - you deserved it (3325)

On 03/01/2010 at 12:01am - misc - by dangit (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was arrested for DWI in my own apartment complex. I had to be released into the custody of a sober adult, but I wasn't allowed access to my phone to get any numbers. I only have a few memorized. So I was picked up from jail by my ex-girlfriend and her fiancé - my manager at work. FML

#8733568
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18698) - you deserved it (15896)

On 02/28/2010 at 10:46pm - misc - by Ben - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got excited because I found a chat line for teens who are dealing with depression. I signed up and was about to enter the chat room and then a message popped up that said ''Sorry this is only available for teens in the United Kingdom.'' FML

#8732304
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23486) - you deserved it (3909)

On 02/28/2010 at 10:16pm - health - by Hannah - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was lobstering. While I was getting bands, my co-worker decided it would be funny to make a lobster pinch my ear. it was a 4 pound lobster, and my ear was swollen for 5 hours. FML

#8731287
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19818) - you deserved it (2372)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:42pm - work - by Fonzie34 (man) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I had just finished riding my bike when I ran into the girl I am secretly in love with. While I walked over to her I got an erection through my spandex biking shorts. FML

#8730305
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22312) - you deserved it (9809)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by hornyloser770 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was loading a very large box into my hatchback. I was really struggling, and a few people walked by and laughed. Then a car pulled up and waited for the spot. There isn't a spring to hold my trunk open, so it slammed onto my head. Twice. The car honked for me to hurry up. FML

#8729495
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24004) - you deserved it (2173)

On 02/28/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was on a crowded el train listening to my iPod touch. As I stepped off the train, my headphones got caught on a man's jacket and my iPod fell on the floor. The doors shut. I then watched the train pull away. With my iPod on it. FML

#8726877
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30495) - you deserved it (3846)

On 02/28/2010 at 7:34pm - money - by rybread (man) - United States

Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML

#8726872
250 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14292) - you deserved it (17569)

On 02/28/2010 at 7:33pm - intimacy - by Joel_28 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my younger sister said that she was going to pray for her brother's HIV. I have Primary Immune Disease (PID) not HIV. School will be very interesting tomorrow. FML

#8725827
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24660) - you deserved it (1587)

On 02/28/2010 at 7:03pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML

#8719561
456 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8241) - you deserved it (57484)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, thanks to my brilliant hairstylist, I ended up with a brand new haircut, which I like to call the "Bowler hat-and-Spaghetti" cut. FML

#8719184
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21752) - you deserved it (3025)

On 02/28/2010 at 2:00pm - misc - by AtikaSucks (woman) - Tunisia



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