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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

#13337964
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41796) - you deserved it (3836)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:32am - misc - by cantstoplaughing (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Mirorbo's comment : I hope you're not going to blame your best friend for it, darling. As shocking as the news is, it's in the past.

See all the comments →

Today, I got up and left for work despite being really sick, because I had a big meeting. Halfway to work, in deadlocked traffic, my boss texts me to let me know he's rescheduling the meeting to tomorrow because of personal conflicts. FML

#13336627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26114) - you deserved it (2662)

On 10/05/2010 at 11:20pm - work - by sick (woman) - United States

Today, I was walking to work through a bad part of town. A man yelled something at me, but knowing what part of town I was in, I ignored him and kept walking. Two seconds later I got hit by a car. Turns out, he was trying to warn me about the car coming right towards me. FML

Today, I started my first day at a new hospital. My first assignment? Shave an elderly man's testicles. FML

#13333152
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39284) - you deserved it (5453)

On 10/05/2010 at 7:36pm - work - by hospital - United States (New York)

Today, I told the girl I've been seeing for a while about the strong feelings that I have for her and that I was falling in love. She told me my words made her realize what it felt like to be in love. My words were so powerful, in fact, that she ran right back into the arms of her ex boyfriend. FML

#13331586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38496) - you deserved it (3545)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I saw a spider crawling on my new roommate's cheek, so I told her to stand still so that I could flick it off. Several long seconds of flicking made me realize that it wasn't a spider at all. I had been flicking her hairy mole. FML

#13331304
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15895) - you deserved it (33276)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:01pm - animals - by jabba (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was kicked out of class for having a coughing fit. Yesterday, I was kicked out of class for sleeping, a side effect of my cough suppressant. Three absents from this class and I automatically fail. FML

Today, I missed my own surprise party because, having heard it being planned, I though it was going to be an intervention. FML

#13328394
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8307) - you deserved it (42655)

On 10/05/2010 at 10:36am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while taking a shower, I thought that the bathroom was extra steamy because of all the hot water. It wasn't until two-three minutes later when I put some shampoo in my hair that I realized I had forgotten to take my glasses off. FML

#13327149
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8716) - you deserved it (37927)

On 10/05/2010 at 6:46am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Varmlands Lan)

Today, I was at work on a smoke break. I work at a truck stop, and it was around 2am. This old man pulls in and asks me if I would like to join him for some dinner. I said no, and told him I was working. He replies, "How much do you charge?" Apparently, even in sweats I look like a hooker. FML

#13326946
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32216) - you deserved it (6458)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:41am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was given a $25 gift certificate for being Employee Of The Week. The gift certificate was 6 months past its expiration date. FML

#13326388
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31363) - you deserved it (2706)

On 10/05/2010 at 3:43am - work - by The Lone Ranger - United States

Today, I got a job in my university library. My job title is technical services. My actual job is pulling off the book label for the scanner and putting a new one on. For six hours a day. FML

#13325308
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23298) - you deserved it (4444)

On 10/05/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by danrocketman - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend grabbed my love handles. It tickled, so I giggled and squirmed out of his grip. He looked at me quizzically and said, "I'm surprised you still have feeling there with all that fat." FML

#13324993
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35970) - you deserved it (8550)

On 10/05/2010 at 12:47am - love - by June - United States (Georgia)



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