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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, at work, my boss and I went upstairs to storage. We got in the elevator, I pressed the 2nd floor button, and it didn't move so I repeatedly pressed the button. It wasn't until the 5th press that I realized we were already on the 2nd floor. She thought I was an idiot. FML

#13452838
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8104) - you deserved it (27263)

On 10/14/2010 at 11:03pm - work - by edodge (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, I got a $200 bonus at work and was super excited about getting a plane ticket to see my family. On the way back from work I got a $300 speeding ticket. FML

#13450505
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11637) - you deserved it (41214)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:43pm - money - by copmagnet - United States

Today, as I put my 4 year old daughter in the car seat, she dropped her crayon. She then paused and matter-of-factly said, "Mommy, I don't say 'f***' anymore when I drop things." FML

#13450247
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25236) - you deserved it (8866)

On 10/14/2010 at 8:25pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's my birthday, and the only person that called me was my boss. He wants me to cover his shift tonight. FML

#13448275
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34703) - you deserved it (2916)

On 10/14/2010 at 6:10pm - work - by unloved - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I was called up about a job I'd recently applied for. I was overly excited to tell them I'd be there on Monday. Then I remembered I canceled my car insurance due to financial difficulties. I have no way of getting there. FML

#13446439
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22685) - you deserved it (8107)

On 10/14/2010 at 3:02pm - work - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized it is now considered normal and routine that my boyfriend wets the bed after a night of drinking. FML

#13446090
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27074) - you deserved it (4712)

On 10/14/2010 at 2:20pm - misc - by Casey - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally admitted to two girls in my first year university astronomy class that I have a strict 10pm bedtime. FML

#13444529
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9831) - you deserved it (31961)

On 10/14/2010 at 10:45am - misc - by pathetic_girl (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, there were reports of a drunk and disorderly male, and I arrived at the scene only to discover a drunk guy having explosive diarrhoea in a photo booth. He turned to me and shouted "God save the Queen!" It's then that I remembered it was my job to do something about it. FML

#13444115
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32809) - you deserved it (3353)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:42am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Reserved

Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML

#13443862
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24372) - you deserved it (6843)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:05am - health - by mikey - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after being "pressured" into a relationship with another guy. But it's okay, she said she would think of me every time she made love to him. FML

#13442740
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39451) - you deserved it (3171)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:24am - intimacy - by tman (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29291) - you deserved it (3600)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, after a small fight with my girlfriend, I started to miss her, so I typed her name into Google on a whim. Surprisingly, I find a link to a blog in which the owner describes his ongoing effort to seduce my girl. During times she told me she was alone. Thanks babe. FML

#13442639
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30897) - you deserved it (3341)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:00am - love - by Anon - United States (California)

Today, out of all the cars in the parking lot, mine got struck by lightning. FML

#13442397
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40411) - you deserved it (3460)

On 10/14/2010 at 3:15am - misc - by A. - United States



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