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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I found out my dad spent most of the $500 I earned from mowing lawns on an Xbox 360 for himself. He was the one who encouraged me to put the money in the bank for college and to learn responsibility. I'm 14 years old. He's 37. FML

#7181170
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33892) - you deserved it (2500)

On 01/06/2010 at 1:19pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 5 month old son decided that my lip ring was a toy. Thinking it would be ok, I let him touch it. He got his finger caught and pulled his hand back. The lip ring is still in, but now I have a huge gaping hole in my face. FML

#7181113
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9711) - you deserved it (48947)

On 01/06/2010 at 1:12pm - kids - by pinky (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, after months of job hunting, I got a call back for a position. I was outside at the time and had no pen or paper available to write the address down. I told the guy to call me back in 5 minutes and he agreed. It's been 3 hours and still no call. FML

#7180420
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11459) - you deserved it (26832)

On 01/06/2010 at 11:44am - work - by noluckwhatsoever (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I went to the DMV to renew my license. When I gave the woman behind the desk my name and social security number she looked confused. She then called over her manager, who did the same thing. Getting nervous, I asked what was wrong. Apparently according to the state of Illinois I'm dead. FML

#7179468
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47927) - you deserved it (2292)

On 01/06/2010 at 9:55am - misc - by driver (man) - United States (Illinois)

me5's comment : The state of ilinois never lies!! Go back to your grave!

See all the comments →

Today, it was snowing really badly, so my boss said that everyone who drove to work could leave. But because I got the bus in, she said that I should stay and do a full day. By the time she eventually decided it was bad enough for me to leave, the buses were cancelled. FML

#7178930
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34006) - you deserved it (2037)

On 01/06/2010 at 8:42am - work - by Snowzies (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I treated my friends to lunch at a posh restaurant because it's my birthday. While we were walking leisurely around the mall afterwards, their boyfriends showed up. I spent the next few hours walking alone behind them while they were walking hand in hand with their boyfriends. FML

#7177665
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32453) - you deserved it (4118)

On 01/06/2010 at 5:07am - misc - by ribbonsundone (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while standing by the kitchen window I noticed a mouse running across our lawn on top of the snow. I called my two daughters to come see it, but by the time they got to the window a hawk was shredding the poor thing to pieces. My kids didn't stop crying for two hours. FML

#7177053
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28277) - you deserved it (6026)

On 01/06/2010 at 3:41am - animals - by motheroftwo (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of not having any friends. So I sent out a mass text saying "Hey, what's up?" to prove her wrong. I didn't get any replies. FML

#7176423
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26277) - you deserved it (7065)

On 01/06/2010 at 2:25am - misc - by Nox (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realized that the only time my girlfriend ever calls me is when she's drunk. FML

#7175057
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26124) - you deserved it (4207)

On 01/06/2010 at 12:53am - love - by drunkdial - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house so that he could break up with me. I went out to my car to leave only to discover that all of the wheels had been stolen. Even the spare. I had to spend the rest of the day with my ex-boyfriend finding a way to get my car home. FML

#7174533
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26113) - you deserved it (2901)

On 01/06/2010 at 12:24am - love - by lug_nut (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I drove my new car with a manual transmission for the first time by myself. I was at a stoplight and saw a cute guy in the car next to me. He looked my way and gave me "the nod". The light turned green and I tried to go but I stalled out, lurching my car forward right into the car next to me. FML

#7174150
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6807) - you deserved it (22979)

On 01/06/2010 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML

#7170495
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24467) - you deserved it (3933)

On 01/05/2010 at 9:06pm - work - by Mark (man) - United States (Virginia)



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