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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I took pills to make sure I lasted longer with my girlfriend. Good news? It worked fine and is still working now. Bad news? We've been done for a good two hours. FML

#9516462
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12168) - you deserved it (30315)

On 03/31/2010 at 12:44am - intimacy - by imsorrylove - United States

Today, I found out that I made inappropriate sexual comments to my boss while I was drunk on Saturday night. She won't tell me what I said. She just laughs when she sees me. FML

#9507833
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10053) - you deserved it (35493)

On 03/30/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by GonnaGetFired - United States (Alaska)

Today, I was about to have sex with my boyfriend. His best friend called and said he just beat God Of War 3 and that my boyfriend could borrow it. He got up, got dressed, ran to his car and told me I could walk home. FML

#9464228
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35336) - you deserved it (6511)

On 03/29/2010 at 12:20am - intimacy - by xxlexi_lovexx - United States (Kansas)

Today, I got dumped because I was on my period. Apparently he was pissed because I have one "like, every single month." FML

Today, I waked in on my boyfriend and his best friend playing "Dick Wars" while wearing glow in the dark condoms. FML

#9416886
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52331) - you deserved it (9986)

On 03/27/2010 at 4:26am - intimacy - by pumpkinlover89 - United States (California)

matt1337c's comment : They're so gay. Was it hot?

See all the comments →

Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML

#9407867
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37474) - you deserved it (6236)

On 03/26/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by Haley. - United States (Arizona)

Today, I got through to the phone interview stage for a great job. When the phone rang, I answered and suddenly, spontaneously, burped really loudly. The interviewer hung up. FML

#9396047
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26346) - you deserved it (10290)

On 03/26/2010 at 5:44am - work - by urrrppp (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)

Today, when I was trying to break up with my boyfriend, I told him how I needed space and time to think. His response was, "Ok, we're out of condoms anyway." FML

#9395131
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27692) - you deserved it (8956)

On 03/26/2010 at 3:31am - intimacy - by d - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house. She had promised me we'd get it on so I couldn't wait. When I got there, I didn't get it on. Instead, I got a list of reasons why I make her depressed. FML

#9387980
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16364) - you deserved it (22629)

On 03/25/2010 at 9:50pm - intimacy - by bad boyfriend - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I just had a phone interview with a college. The lady asked me to spell out my password to a site so she can access my test scores. The password was "dick." FML

#9372806
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11847) - you deserved it (49104)

On 03/25/2010 at 7:07am - intimacy - by uhoh901 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while having sex, I tried to kick the blanket over my feet and kneed myself in the face. FML

#9371733
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10661) - you deserved it (24469)

On 03/25/2010 at 4:00am - intimacy - by ouch (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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