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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulls away, and goes, 'OMNOMNOMNOM' then continues kissing me. FML

#8938821
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23297) - you deserved it (21269)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:43am - love - by anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

#8938594
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28862) - you deserved it (2541)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I ran into my manipulative ex-boyfriend at a party. We were chatting and I mentioned that the guys I have been seeing lately all turn out to be jerks. He says "yeah well you dumped me and don't deserve to be happy." Apparently he has been creeping and scaring off any guys interested in me. FML

#8938160
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32148) - you deserved it (3816)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:04am - love - by fu2then (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I have to spend over an hour at a Gamestop so my boyfriend can get his 'Final Fantasy' game at midnight. I'm tired, I don't want to stand around any more, and all the people around around me are debating super heroes. I'm living in an episode of 'The Big Bang Theory.' FML

#8936856
386 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11762) - you deserved it (33899)

On 03/09/2010 at 12:12am - misc - by notanerd - United States

Today, I returned home from a 2-day trip. Before I left, I told my brother to move my car across the street when the street cleaner passes by. Turns out, he used all my gas and got so wasted he forgot to move my car. I got a big ticket that he said he'd pay for. He's unemployed and lives off me. FML

#8930944
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22210) - you deserved it (4549)

On 03/08/2010 at 9:24pm - money - by yessssir - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I posted a pic of my prom dress on facebook. The dress looked amazing on me and it just felt so right. So I spent every single dollar I had and some borrowed to buy the dress. When I logged on later that night, the first comment asked "Is this a joke?" FML

#8929272
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23122) - you deserved it (4441)

On 03/08/2010 at 8:39pm - misc - by yayaimannoying (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found the purity ring I lost a year ago. Too bad I lost my virginity 4 months ago. FML

#8928407
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5595) - you deserved it (28872)

On 03/08/2010 at 8:11pm - intimacy - by BNLM - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 3 years left me because apparently I'm "too beautiful and he can no longer handle other guys always trying to flirt with me." FML

#8927721
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29388) - you deserved it (6132)

On 03/08/2010 at 7:49pm - love - by dead - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

#8923957
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20308) - you deserved it (6110)

On 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm - health - by gotitEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I showed my fiancé the darling Tinkerbell hoodie I'd bought myself during the weekend. Instead of liking it as I'd hoped, he told me my childish wardrobe was embarrassing, and he wasn't going to be seen in public with me until I wore something different. FML

#8922378
356 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12030) - you deserved it (49216)

On 03/08/2010 at 4:35pm - love - by Crystal (woman) - United Kingdom (Staffordshire)

Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML

#8921523
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28261) - you deserved it (3253)

On 03/08/2010 at 3:54pm - love - by HaleyIsabelle - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was invited by my boyfriend's parents for dinner at their house. The dinner went well I thought, until I was getting ready to leave. Before I could make it out the front door, I could hear them discussing their disappointment that their son would ever consider someone like me. FML

#8920959
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29308) - you deserved it (2252)

On 03/08/2010 at 3:27pm - love - by justpeachy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I moved into my aunt's house. She had a little too much fun in the sixties and now tells everyone about her many imagined conquests, including her church minister and several has-been celebrities. As a plus, I discovered she has a habit of wandering around the house in the nude. FML

#8920023
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21498) - you deserved it (3236)

On 03/08/2010 at 2:31pm - misc - by Kristopher (man) - United States (Florida)



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