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Man or woman?

Today, I found out that my girlfriend started a fake argument and pretended to be mad at me for four days, which was almost enough time for the gigantic hickey that my best friend gave her on her neck to heal. FML

#8588296
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36931) - you deserved it (2007)

On 02/23/2010 at 1:57pm - love - by mrniceguy - United States

Today, I had to confess to my mother that I was too hungover to take her to her AA meeting. FML

#8587939
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8306) - you deserved it (33386)

On 02/23/2010 at 1:33pm - kids - by geeb - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went into my parents room to empty their wastebasket. Next to it and around their bed, I found tissues that were soaked in an unknown sticky substance. I had to pick them up. FML

#8587618
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25156) - you deserved it (3135)

On 02/23/2010 at 1:09pm - misc - by disgusted - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML

#8586594
273 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22941) - you deserved it (6816)

On 02/23/2010 at 11:48am - intimacy - by jasmine - United States

Today, on Facebook, I joined a group called "I want our relationship to last." My boyfriend commented "I don't." FML

#8586322
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30911) - you deserved it (6189)

On 02/23/2010 at 11:28am - love - by kal (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, it appears that my upstairs neighbour has decided to learn how to play the trombone. FML

#8585714
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24472) - you deserved it (2627)

On 02/23/2010 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was making schnitzel at our kitchen so I had to get rid of all the oil. So I decided it would be best to put the hot pan on our porch so the oil would cool down and then I could get rid of it. Unfortunately the ground is sealed with tar, so the tar melted and now the pan is stuck to the ground. FML

#8583652
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7904) - you deserved it (26971)

On 02/23/2010 at 7:54am - health - by peterpan (man) - Germany (Hessen)

Today, I went over to my girlfriend's parents house for dinner. This was the first time I was meeting them, so I bought a $70 bottle of red wine to try and impress them. I tried to be smooth while popping the cork. I did, but the bottle slipped and red wine poured onto their white carpet. FML

#8583578
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26740) - you deserved it (7558)

On 02/23/2010 at 7:51am - misc - by medik - United States (Texas)

Today, I was working the night shift at the hotel I'm employed at. After checking in a young couple to the room above the main office, I was forced to listen to them having it off for most of the night, serving a very loud reminder that I've been single for five years. FML

#8582830
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19323) - you deserved it (2820)

On 02/23/2010 at 6:52am - intimacy - by Cromwel620 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I tried to see if you can kick yourself in the nuts. You can. FML

#8581671
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5993) - you deserved it (63520)

On 02/23/2010 at 4:28am - misc - by nutcracker (man) - Slovenia (Bohinj)

Today, on the way home from a night out, I crossed the main road in my town via the traffic lights. As I got to the other side, a guy turned to his two friends and 'whispered' with a look of disgust, "I would have run that one over." Thanks. FML

#8580880
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22675) - you deserved it (2440)

On 02/23/2010 at 3:05am - misc - by thetallone (woman) - United Kingdom (Blackpool)

Today, I went to move my girlfriend's car. I failed to notice that the snow packed under the front bumper is actually ice. After a bit of struggle I managed to move the car. The bumper, however, is now a separate entity. FML

#8580764
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18715) - you deserved it (6118)

On 02/23/2010 at 2:56am - misc - by Good_old_Grim (man) - Latvia (Riga)



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