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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my husband and I had sex for the first time because we pledged we wouldn't have sex until we were married. He's terrible. FML

#10894032
324 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28695) - you deserved it (66793)

On 05/31/2010 at 9:35pm - intimacy - by anonomus - United States (Virginia)

robinsn's comment : Most people are their first time.

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Today, I found out that my family hides food from me. FML

#10893433
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25884) - you deserved it (18353)

On 05/31/2010 at 9:09pm - health - by Stupid_Chick - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered that I'm allergic to band-aids. I now have a band-aid shaped rash around a tiny cut on my leg. Oh the irony. FML

#10884107
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25442) - you deserved it (3601)

On 05/31/2010 at 11:43am - health - by twnty1 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my fiancé admitted to me that he only found big girls attractive, that's why he could "never cheat on me with my friends." FML

#10881510
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37853) - you deserved it (6598)

On 05/31/2010 at 8:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my friends and I finished a 2 day, 40km bush walk. We parked a car at the finish of the track and drove another car to the start, so we could drive back and pick it up when we finished. At the end of the trek, I realised I had left the keys for the second car in the first car. FML

#10881401
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11816) - you deserved it (33155)

On 05/31/2010 at 7:59am - misc - by frgn8r (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to my orthodontist where I was informed that I'll going to the prom, to my brother's wedding, and maybe to university with braces in my mouth. FML

#10880596
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27350) - you deserved it (8870)

On 05/31/2010 at 5:15am - health - by FarisH (man) - Jordan (Amman Governorate)

Today, my boyfriend came home while I was making a snack in the kitchen. We started making out and he lifted me up and sat my ass on the hot stove. FML

#10870202
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38549) - you deserved it (7643)

On 05/30/2010 at 8:27pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was dirty texting my boyfriend since we couldn't see each other this weekend. We were getting really into it when he said, "If only you were this good in real life." FML

#10870072
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37788) - you deserved it (10649)

On 05/30/2010 at 8:19pm - intimacy - by lonelyandbored - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found that my cats somehow managed to pull the plug of my fridge out of the socket. Several days ago. Now I have to get rid of a ton of stinking food and clean the stinking fridge. FML

#10863158
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24692) - you deserved it (6843)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:53pm - animals - by Alexander (man) - Russian Federation (Saint Petersburg City)

Today, as a bridal shower gift, I got a "coupon" for 25% off divorce attorney fees. It was a collective gift. FML

#10862777
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31628) - you deserved it (3794)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:29pm - misc - by Nikki (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of five months is pregnant. Apparently, she stopped taking her pill two months ago because "we" wanted a baby. I don't recall ever having that discussion with her. FML

#10857993
299 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46471) - you deserved it (9384)

On 05/30/2010 at 4:05am - kids - by BabyDaddy (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, a four pound can of tuna fell on my head at work, and it burst all over my clothes. Since I'm the manager, I had to stay all day reeking of tuna. Now I'm home, my damn cat won't leave me alone. FML

#10855287
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30845) - you deserved it (4180)

On 05/30/2010 at 1:12am - animals - by Alpheas - United States (Texas)

Today, I was spelling T-R-E-A-T to my fiancé so that the dog wouldn't understand what I was talking about. Turns out, neither could my fiancé. FML

#10853555
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29512) - you deserved it (5174)

On 05/30/2010 at 12:01am - animals - by misTreated (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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