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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my family and I were discussing my birthday in a couple weeks. As they asked what I wanted, I told them it was up to them. So my mother suggested that she'll get me electrolysis so I wouldn't have to worry about my mustache in college. FML

#6650801
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23742) - you deserved it (4426)

On 12/07/2009 at 2:18pm - love - by sexyyy (woman) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I finally got a hold of my husband who I haven't actually talked to in 2 and 1/2 weeks since he is deployed and it's hard to chat. He told me he couldn't talk because he was in an epic battle, in Call of Duty. FML

#6650793
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30432) - you deserved it (4192)

On 12/07/2009 at 2:16pm - love - by Dejected (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months called me. He said his mom was making him choose between having a dog or having a girlfriend. I asked him which one he picked. He was quiet, I heard barking in the background. FML

#6650131
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39604) - you deserved it (4330)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:20pm - love - by WoofWoof (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went to pick up my paycheck at the convenience store I work at. While there, two frat boys came in and bought seventeen 30 packs of beer. That comes to about $300. They spent more at the store in one day than I get paid in two weeks. FML

#6649711
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26043) - you deserved it (3892)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:39pm - money - by ditzen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, after complaining to the administration about my roommate, I finally got switched. As I went into the room to meet my new roommate, I found out he was my old roommate's brother. They are exactly the same, and I'm not allowed to switch again. FML

#6649432
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31185) - you deserved it (2981)

On 12/07/2009 at 12:08pm - misc - by mylifesuckssomuch3214 (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out from my mom that the sweet smelling shampoo she bought recently belongs to Tammi. I've been using it for a week now. The chocolate drops I ate yesterday are also hers. Tammi is our pet Chihuahua. FML

#6648312
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20331) - you deserved it (8141)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:44am - misc - by cookiecrust (woman) - Singapore

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I chose to date him. After going on for five minutes about how unique and funny he is, I ask him the same question. His reply? "You were the first person to ask me out." He then rolled over and fell asleep. FML

#6648301
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24589) - you deserved it (3426)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:43am - misc - by Fluory (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out the weekly coffee talks my husband was having with his ex-girlfriend stopped involving coffee about 2 years ago. FML

#6647027
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32196) - you deserved it (18727)

On 12/07/2009 at 5:33am - love - by Jane (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, a friend of mine and I were talking about how hygienic we are. She mentioned she hadn't shaved her downstairs in a while. I was looking at the computer when she said this so when I turned to look at her I saw she had pulled down her pants and underwear. I was face to face with hairy muff. FML

#6646693
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20381) - you deserved it (3529)

On 12/07/2009 at 4:30am - intimacy - by roxyriley - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was doing homework in my room when my roommate started meowing all of a sudden. Not only was he meowing, he started to make loud cat noises that resembled a cat being run over by a car. He's gonna be my roommate for the rest of the year. FML

#6646444
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26987) - you deserved it (2913)

On 12/07/2009 at 3:54am - animals - by SeeMeInTheDark (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boyfriend invited me for dinner to meet his parents. Turns out his stepmother is my gynecologist. FML

#6645484
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36635) - you deserved it (2523)

On 12/07/2009 at 2:00am - misc - by Twiddle (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a new smart phone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML

#6645209
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8745) - you deserved it (41585)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by smart phone mms - United States

Today, I pretended to smoke a bread stick that looked like a cigar. It made me feel cool. FML

#6644782
12 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10226) - you deserved it (35776)

On 12/07/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by CH (man) - United States (Missouri)



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