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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was picking up my little sister from school and while waiting I decided to have a smoke. I was caught and was told to go to the principal's office. I'm 23. FML

#7508111
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14291) - you deserved it (24363)

On 01/22/2010 at 9:10pm - misc - by oldschool (man) - United States (California)

Today, while grooming my horse, a spider crawled onto my ear. As if that was bad enough, I'm extremely arachnophobic, so I shrieked out of habit, which in turn caused my horse to freak out and kick me. FML

Today, I have been dating an incredibly gorgeous woman. She had a poor self image and after the longest time, I finally convinced her to seek counselling to help her self esteem. It worked. So well in fact that she just broke up with me because she "finally realized she could do so much better" FML

#7505237
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33662) - you deserved it (5012)

On 01/22/2010 at 7:10pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she suspected me of cheating. She thought I was cheating because she caught me sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was sneaking out to plan my proposal to her. FML

#7503398
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35262) - you deserved it (3595)

On 01/22/2010 at 5:41pm - love - by ponyboy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML

#7502995
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27060) - you deserved it (5220)

On 01/22/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by hoody (man) - United States

Today, I was lying on the couch after having surgery on my stomach. My best friend and my mom thought that laughter would be the best medicine. Due to their medicine, I ripped out half my stitches. FML

#7502542
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29657) - you deserved it (2262)

On 01/22/2010 at 5:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up with my face sharpied. I live alone. FML

#7501218
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41664) - you deserved it (3534)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by Funnymann - United States

Today, I found my mom throwing my very expensive and important medication down the toilet. She thought I was doing drugs. FML

#7499044
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30437) - you deserved it (2442)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I went to contest a parking ticket in court. I came out 3 hours later, all charges clear, to a new parking ticket on my windshield, for the same amount I just got cleared. FML

#7497473
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9091) - you deserved it (25998)

On 01/22/2010 at 11:28am - misc - by sdfsdf - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found out that when you hit the neighbor's dog with your car, they might chase you a mile with a shotgun. FML

#7493759
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9463) - you deserved it (38217)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:14am - animals - by S.Bunny (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML

#7493708
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28313) - you deserved it (5259)

On 01/22/2010 at 3:11am - kids - by jazz - Sent from mobile version

Today, I ran 5 miles to catch the bus I take to university after missing my connection. When I got to the bus stop, I realized I had left my U-Pass on my desk at home. On top of the assignment that was due. FML

#7493259
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23129) - you deserved it (7710)

On 01/22/2010 at 2:32am - misc - by noooooo (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was sitting in IHOP with my girlfriend of six months when she brought in her son of three years she had neglected to tell me about, and asked 'Does this change things?' FML

#7493189
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32756) - you deserved it (4096)

On 01/22/2010 at 2:26am - love - by Rodrigeuz26 (man) - United States (Illinois)



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