Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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Today, I found out that my boyfriend asked me to marry him because he could get a tax cut from buying the ring. All of this happened in front of his mother. FML

#7804669
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21625) - you deserved it (2040)

On 02/02/2010 at 1:20am - love - by engagedmaybe (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was in the car with my friends. A techno song came on and we started fist pumping. We hit a bump, I fist pumped myself in the face, and crashed into a stop sign. FML

#7803778
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11096) - you deserved it (49003)

On 02/02/2010 at 12:51am - misc - by wolfpacking - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got a ticket. The officer's daughter is my ex. He gave me a ticket for 31 in a 30 mph zone. FML

#7803637
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34551) - you deserved it (5009)

On 02/02/2010 at 12:47am - misc - by anoynomous - Sent from mobile version

Today, the windows on my car were frozen. I filled up a bucket of hot water, and threw it on the windows. The windows cracked. FML

#7803413
293 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7402) - you deserved it (75567)

On 02/02/2010 at 12:40am - misc - by Chris - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up in the hospital. I had apparently overworked my heart so much that I fainted. What caused it? I was playing a racing game on my Wii and freaked out when I won first place. FML

#7789192
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13037) - you deserved it (34105)

On 02/01/2010 at 7:40pm - health - by overexcited (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

#7782568
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36751) - you deserved it (9460)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:56pm - love - by kaitlynn - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went outside to scrape the inch and a half of ice off my car so I could get to work. After half an hour of intense scraping, I realized that it wasn't my car. FML

#7782560
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14206) - you deserved it (24511)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was spacing out in French class and randomly got an erection. My professor called on me to stand up at the front of the room and say, "I am wearing a belt," in French. Not everyone was observing just my belt. FML

#7782514
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32493) - you deserved it (5687)

On 02/01/2010 at 3:51pm - misc - by boner (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

#7780958
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35257) - you deserved it (3795)

On 02/01/2010 at 2:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

#7776158
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11869) - you deserved it (34176)

On 02/01/2010 at 9:34am - animals - by adad - Sent from mobile version

Today, I heard the sound of footsteps in the basement. Thinking it was burglars I grabbed a baseball bat and hurried down the stairs. I then tripped on the stairs, fell down them and smacked my head on the bat. The sound of footsteps I heard? It was my cat playing in some cardboard boxes. FML

#7775610
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21619) - you deserved it (6423)

On 02/01/2010 at 8:45am - animals - by dontbadouche - Senegal

Today, my mother gave my daughter a behavior chart. I noticed that "drinking beer" was at the top of one of the columns. It's a chart for my daughter to use on me so my mother can judge my parenting skills. I am currently losing a sticker right now for being on the computer. FML

#7775302
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30651) - you deserved it (4553)

On 02/01/2010 at 8:17am - kids - by argh (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while in the elevator with the girl from my office that I've been crushing on, but never spoken to, I said "aren't elevators awkward?" After a long silence, she got off three floors before our office. FML

#7774982
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12238) - you deserved it (23235)

On 02/01/2010 at 7:36am - misc - by wilsmith (man) - China (Beijing)



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