Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

#7598826
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11730) - you deserved it (25147)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, some girl from Colorado called me. She knew my name. My Facebook. I had no idea how she got my number. She then asks me out. I say "sure" sarcastically. She then calls my girlfriend, who also lives in Colorado. Our relationship is now over. FML

#7598388
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10979) - you deserved it (33696)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:12pm - love - by Aaron (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML

#7594942
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34613) - you deserved it (2093)

On 01/26/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by newniece (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out my bank account was in the negative because my work gave me a check that didn't clear. I went to my bank to get a statement of charges so my job could reimburse me. They told me requesting a statement costs 8 dollars, which I don't have because my account is in the negative. FML

#7591885
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25665) - you deserved it (2327)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:33pm - money - by tinaburrito - Sent from mobile version

Today, my parents got me a new computer for my birthday. They also took the liberty of throwing out my old computer, with 8 years of photos, videos, music, documents, emails, and bookmarks on it. But that's okay, I had a backup. They threw that out too. FML

#7591747
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36037) - you deserved it (2163)

On 01/26/2010 at 4:25pm - misc - by computergeek (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, after wondering why I didn't receive a grade for a summer course I took in 2007, I realized that I gave the professor the wrong student ID number. Someone else received credit. I've been waiting on this grade for 8 months in order to graduate. FML

#7589933
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13209) - you deserved it (27440)

On 01/26/2010 at 2:03pm - misc - by optimist - United States (California)

Today, my family threw me a surprise party for my 29th Birthday. My brother-in-law sent me a text telling me they were all waiting for me to arrive. Thinking it was at my sister's home, I drove two hours there. It was actually at my parents' house. I missed my party and they ate my cake. FML

#7589871
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24370) - you deserved it (7786)

On 01/26/2010 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's raining at my work. Not outside, inside. Because our building's boiler broke and all the pipes are dripping with condensation. I have to sit at my desk under an umbrella to protect my laptop and desk phone. The HVAC company said, "Don't worry, this is normal." FML

#7589766
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23398) - you deserved it (1783)

On 01/26/2010 at 1:44pm - work - by dripdripdrop (woman) - United States (California)

Today, at work at daycare, this kid was coughing really bad, so I put my hand in front of his mouth in case he was choking on something so he could spit it out. But nope he wasn't choking, he was sick. He puked right into my hands. FML

#7588256
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11249) - you deserved it (24525)

On 01/26/2010 at 11:13am - work - by Kylie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was driving home from college when I saw a couple of sporty chicks jogging on the side of the road. I honked at them and yelled suggestively as I do at college, which usually gets a fun flirty reaction from college girls. It was my next-door neighbor and her 11 year old daughter. FML

#7587300
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5494) - you deserved it (50105)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:39am - misc - by Fonz (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was at my Muay Thai class. We were doing a combination which consisted of a low kick, body kick and head kick. My partner had already done the low kick so I held the pads for the body kick. He kicked me straight in the jaw. I'm a teenage girl and he's a fully grown man. FML

#7586565
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31918) - you deserved it (3364)

On 01/26/2010 at 7:55am - health - by anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, I went on a date with the hottest guy I've ever met. He is also rich and successful, and would probably be perfect for me, if only he could stop bragging about it. FML

#7586037
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27233) - you deserved it (13084)

On 01/26/2010 at 6:30am - love - by OTZ - Sent from mobile version



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