Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my fiance told me he thought it was time that we started to see other people. I'm six months pregnant with his baby. FML

#5968857
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48696) - you deserved it (3858)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:49am - love - by Marcella (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found my brand new tropical fish dead in its tank because my boyfriend got drunk last night and decided to pour red wine into the aquarium. FML

#5968472
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30592) - you deserved it (3114)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:26am - misc - by Brinty (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went to the post office and as I entered the building my car alarm went off. Thinking I'd accidentally pressed the alarm on my keys, I shut it off without looking. When I returned to my car, the passenger window was demolished and my purse with all my money was gone. FML

#5968362
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8738) - you deserved it (33917)

On 10/24/2009 at 12:19am - misc - by kiran - United States (California)

Today, I found a dead puppy in my backyard. I have never owned any pets. FML

#5966909
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36896) - you deserved it (2048)

On 10/23/2009 at 10:59pm - misc - by WhyMe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was changing my shirt in the bathroom when I dropped it. It fell on my foot, so I decided to flip it up with my foot instead of bending down to get it. I flipped it, and it landed in the toilet. Which somebody had not flushed. FML

#5966338
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11702) - you deserved it (30378)

On 10/23/2009 at 10:25pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years old. I'm 25. FML

#5966282
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33697) - you deserved it (11734)

On 10/23/2009 at 10:23pm - misc - by lloydLO (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was working a haunted house. I have a really good spot where I hide and scare people. This really hot guy was walking up, and I jumped out and screamed. He punched me in the face. FML

#5964680
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30710) - you deserved it (6531)

On 10/23/2009 at 8:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was driving on the freeway. I shut my windows and sunroof when I started to feel heavy rain hitting me in the face and shoulder. I was confused by the rain because the sun was bright and there was blue, cloudless sky. Then I saw the large trash truck in front of me spewing "trash juice". FML

#5959994
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32857) - you deserved it (2778)

On 10/23/2009 at 3:19pm - misc - by iross (man) - United States (California)

Today, I heard whimpering while I was in my bedroom. Thinking it was my parents doing something nasty, I let them do it and turned on my music. My parents came home from work and I realised they were never home. I went into the room and saw my dead dog laying on the floor. FML

#5959934
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50340) - you deserved it (9907)

On 10/23/2009 at 3:13pm - love - by ashleyramsay (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, after a long workout I come back to my locker, to find my lock had been cut. I looked inside realizing my phone and ipod had been stolen. If that wasn't bad enough, my keys were gone. I ran out to the parking lot to find an empty spot where my car had once been parked. FML

#5958359
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45745) - you deserved it (2640)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:48pm - misc - by abdominates (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, they are pumping out the septic system in the building next door. I am three months pregnant, suffering from morning sickness, and can smell everything within a three-mile radius. FML

#5958040
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32718) - you deserved it (3344)

On 10/23/2009 at 12:12pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to remind my roommates of the importance of wearing clothing at all times in the common living area. My roommates are my parents. FML

#5957888
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32684) - you deserved it (5421)

On 10/23/2009 at 11:54am - misc - by ihatemylife (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my old highschool math teacher called me, asking me to please stop calling him at 2AM every weekend. Turns out my best friend uses my cellphone to call his number every time she's drunk, and declares her eternal love to him. FML

#5957571
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32189) - you deserved it (3821)

On 10/23/2009 at 11:15am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Flevoland)



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