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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I had to put my 17 year old cat down. I cried the whole way up to the vet's office and back. After finally coming to terms with the situation, and trying to forget, my dad's friend walks up to me and says, "So, I heard you killed your cat?" FML

#6415288
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30645) - you deserved it (3291)

On 11/22/2009 at 11:30pm - love - by petlover (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend broke up me with for being the "perfect boyfriend". Apparently I'm the best boyfriend she's ever had, and she didn't know how to take it. So she dumped me. FML

#6414657
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41918) - you deserved it (3290)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:59pm - love - by Micheal (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I woke up after a night out at the bar, immediately remembering that I had lost my cell phone, my ID and somehow spent $100. Feeling like shit already, my friend then goes on to tell me that I flashed the entire bar, and ran around the hotel naked. FML

#6414325
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7185) - you deserved it (37267)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:45pm - misc - by drunkennight (woman) - Canada (New Brunswick)

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

#6413436
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14973) - you deserved it (5748)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:06pm - intimacy - by NotsexyEnough - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. We were starting to get intimate, and I thought it would be kinky to tie his hands to his bed so he'd be more turned on. Suddenly his mom called us for dinner, but I couldn't untie him fast enough. I had to sit there, embarrassed, while his mom undid the rope. FML

#6411627
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7756) - you deserved it (23728)

On 11/22/2009 at 8:35pm - intimacy - by Sam (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while looking through a stack of possible pictures for Facebook, I found one I really liked, until I noticed that I have recently developed a bald patch. Problem? I am a 22 year old woman. FML

#6408288
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27563) - you deserved it (2611)

On 11/22/2009 at 5:13pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wyoming)

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

#6408198
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23264) - you deserved it (5365)

On 11/22/2009 at 5:07pm - animals - by Annie (woman) - Mexico (Coahuila de Zaragoza)

Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML

#6406630
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42156) - you deserved it (2490)

On 11/22/2009 at 3:23pm - misc - by anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my family sat me down and told me I was spending way too much time with my boyfriend and not enough time with them. My boyfriend has been away in Iraq for six months and just came home a week ago. FML

#6406317
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40116) - you deserved it (2154)

On 11/22/2009 at 3:03pm - love - by gj09 - United States

Today, I was at a party with my boyfriend of one year when an attractive girl walks over. She asks him, "Is this your girlfriend?" He replied "That depends... are you single?" FML

#6404510
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42449) - you deserved it (3331)

On 11/22/2009 at 12:49pm - love - by Rejected. (woman) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I arrived in Austria. Within about an hour, I realized that I couldn't understand any "German". Turns out they have a totally different dialect here to anything I was taught in school. I'm here till May. FML

#6404415
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22896) - you deserved it (16977)

On 11/22/2009 at 12:39pm - misc - by nolinguist (woman) - Austria (Oberosterreich)

Today, I woke up to find my car broken into. They also took the inhaler that fell out of my bag the night before. The one I needed to stop the asthma attack I had from the stress of having my car broken into. FML

#6403775
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33468) - you deserved it (2396)

On 11/22/2009 at 11:49am - health - by trying2breathe (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, as I woke up early to do my physics homework, I heard my parents talk about how big a disappointment I am for them. They discussed how stupid, immature and how big a burden I was. They knew I was listening. FML

#6403187
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33984) - you deserved it (4061)

On 11/22/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by Cerezo (man) - Guatemala (Guatemala)



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