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Today, I thought one of my flatmates was beating his girlfriend, so I barged in about to stop him. Turned out they were having really rough sex. FML

MrBoredomioo's comment : At least you cared about her

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Today, I had a sneeze attack while my nose was bleeding. Now my living room looks like a crime scene. FML

#21332502
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33658) - you deserved it (2791)

On 01/07/2015 at 2:07am - misc - by MonsterProblems (woman) - Croatia

Today, I got stuck in an elevator. I called the fire department and told them where I was. They said they'd be right there and not to panic. It's hour 6. FML

#21332463
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33063) - you deserved it (2035)

On 01/07/2015 at 1:03am - health - by random875 - United States (Maryland)

danielhartlesss's comment : Should've told them you're stuck in a flaming elevator

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Today, I asked my boyfriend how he felt about me and he said, "You're the hottest seven I've ever met." FML

#21332358
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29136) - you deserved it (3606)

On 01/06/2015 at 10:54pm - love - by LadyNexus (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

RobinGoodfellow's comment : It's not a great compliment, but at least he didn't say you're the second-hottest seven.

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Today, I spent an hour in a snowstorm waiting for my bus to show up. After I got fed up, I decided to just clean off my car and drive to work. After I was halfway finished swiping off the snow and ice stuck to my car, the bus drove right past me. FML

#21332250
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25922) - you deserved it (3796)

On 01/06/2015 at 8:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, I finally met my long-distance boyfriend of three years for the first time in person. After an amazing dinner and movie date, we went back to his house, only for him to dump me half an hour later. Not because I wouldn't have sex with him. No, his cat doesn't like me. FML

#21332217
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30634) - you deserved it (7391)

On 01/06/2015 at 7:32pm - animals - by dragonfyre73 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I moved into my new apartment complex. I left some items including a cherished painting my best friend made for me outside the front door while I moved furniture into my bedroom. When I went back outside, someone had kicked a huge hole in the painting. Welcome to the neighborhood. FML

#21332211
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27127) - you deserved it (3645)

On 01/06/2015 at 7:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I was working out on a horse farm. I slipped and fell on some ice, whacking my head on the metal gate in the process. As I was getting up, I accidentally grabbed the electric fence. FML

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I went to leave my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

#21332094
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24620) - you deserved it (3113)

On 01/06/2015 at 3:57pm - misc - by trixanne (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my brother admitted that he decides whether he will date a girl or not based on the number of likes she gets on her selfies. We share the same blood. FML

#21332081
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29787) - you deserved it (2936)

On 01/06/2015 at 3:36pm - misc - by Discouraged (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, desperate for work, I went into a shop and asked the owner if he had any spare jobs to fill. He looked me up and down and sneered "Yes, but not for people like... you." FML

#21332025
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27453) - you deserved it (2539)

On 01/06/2015 at 1:54pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, at a candlelit dinner, I accidentally set my dad's leg on fire. FML

#21331973
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25582) - you deserved it (3997)

On 01/06/2015 at 11:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Vietnam (Ho Chi Minh)

Today, someone tried to break into my dorm room while I was in class. Ramming the metal door with their shoulder just dented it, so they pissed on my welcome mat and left. FML

#21331929
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30167) - you deserved it (2182)

On 01/06/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by rimenrezon (woman) - United States (Florida)



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  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

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