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Today, we finished a sit-up test at school. I had been training for the athletic tests, so I was proud of my score. When someone asked what I got and I shared, proud, they responded with, "I bet it helps that your fat bounces you back up." FML

#21205700
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41924) - you deserved it (4107)

On 07/11/2014 at 2:04am - health - by Useless training - United States (Illinois)

SnowxSakura's comment : Don't let them get to you, be proud of what you're doing and keep up the hard work.

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Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML

#21205559
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40444) - you deserved it (3470)

On 07/10/2014 at 11:32pm - misc - by look how totally not racist I am! - United States (California)

Crofty92's comment : Hopefully people won't assume you're a racist just because your mother is.

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Today, I was interviewing a woman for a job. She told me that she may need days off because of her artistic son. I jokingly replied, "Does he color on the walls or something?" She then stared at me with a weird look on her face. Autistic, her son is autistic. FML

#21205262
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37693) - you deserved it (19539)

On 07/10/2014 at 6:17pm - work - by dammit hearing aid - United States (Iowa)

Mynameislinh's comment : Well, they do sound alike... You could explain to her the misunderstanding and everything may be cleared up.

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Today, I nearly had an anxiety attack trying to sneak up on my sister to silly-string her. FML

#21205230
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30368) - you deserved it (11769)

On 07/10/2014 at 5:28pm - misc - by cassieono - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML

#21205080
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48358) - you deserved it (4714)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

#21204913
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45696) - you deserved it (7866)

On 07/10/2014 at 9:34am - love - by oh my fucking god (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I went to the public library for the first time ever. The librarian told me I couldn't get a library card because I had an outstanding balance of $130.00 from 1995. I was born in 1991. FML

#21204670
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46404) - you deserved it (3965)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:27am - misc - by library book - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out the record label I was talking to was actually just my friends who have way too much time on their hands. FML

#21204665
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39809) - you deserved it (5062)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:24am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boss delivered some flowers and a sympathy card signed by everyone in the office to my cubicle. The card said, "Sorry your mom died". My mom isn't dead. I don't know where they got the idea from and no one believes me. They said that denial is part of grieving. FML

#21204205
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43421) - you deserved it (3072)

On 07/09/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by ninnang - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my road rage got so out of hand that I'm now actually inclined to honk obnoxiously at my computer when it's being slow. FML

#21204164
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28719) - you deserved it (14826)

On 07/09/2014 at 4:49pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a grown man yelled at me because he'd been waiting for 15 minutes and still hadn't been seated or had his order taken. We were at a self-serve breakfast buffet. FML

#21203953
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42982) - you deserved it (3520)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:54pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, at my job at a frozen yogurt shop, an elderly woman gladly announced that I'd be seeing a lot of her due to the vaginal infection that she has. Thank you for that, ma'am. FML

#21203678
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40919) - you deserved it (3697)

On 07/09/2014 at 3:26am - health - by Sun_Kissed18 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, at my football game, I turned around to spit so that it would be away from my teammates. I ended up spitting on a 10-year-old kid walking behind me. FML

#21203602
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37345) - you deserved it (17534)

On 07/09/2014 at 1:38am - kids - by whoops - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

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